We Have the Power to Change Our Lives
We can choose old habits and stay in the sameness of whatever rut we’re in.
Or we can make a different choice and change our life.
We can Think a different Thought.
We can Choose a different Action.
We can create a new Habit, however small or profound, that leads us on a New Course.
We have the Power to Change our Thoughts.
We have the Power to Change our Habits.
We have the Power to Change our Actions.
We have the Power to Change our Lives.
All You Really Do Need is LOVE
How do you heal and sooth the savage beast?
How do you heal and sooth
the dark parts and the recesses of the self?
How do you heal and release hatred?
How do you heal and release resentment?
How do you forgive?
By loving yourself enough
to release the hate and resentment.
How do you become the best version of yourself?
By meeting yourself exactly where you are and loving and accepting yourself exactly as you are. By deciding once and for all that you are worthy and deserving of love and loving yourself unconditionally.
You will then begin to make different, more loving choices. Your interactions with others will start to come from that place of love inside of you.
When you love yourself, really love yourself, you become free to love others without conditions.
And the World Becomes a Better Place Just by You Being In It.
Our Flaws Are Our Uniqueness and Oftentimes Our Genius
Hemingway wrote, “The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places.”
I first heard this many years ago and it struck a very real chord with me. Over the course of my life since, I have found this truth at play in countless instances.
We see it in the gnarls of an old tree. Years of weather and the knocks it has sustained have shaped it, given it character, have made it stronger where it once was broken and it is all the more beautiful because of it.
Its will to live has been relentless. It has survived.
As human beings we are considered flawed with our imperfections but flaws, like beauty are subjective and in the eye of the beholder. Our flaws are our uniqueness and oftentimes our genius. They make us who we are.
Like the old tree, our experiences shape our life and build our character. They cover every aspect of us. What we choose to do with our life experiences, whether we allow these experiences to make us or break us, shows our true mettle.
And when we do break, do we stay broken or do the cracks mend and fortify our strength, our resolve, our stubbornness to not only survive, but to thrive?
When something breaks, whether it’s a job, a career, a relationship or an ideal we once held dear, whatever the situation, we can choose to either fix it or move on. The discomfort of dissatisfaction can catapult us with a do or die, settle or fly kind of angst that propels us to take the big chances we need to take, because we have nothing else to lose. We become stronger from the experience and we take what we’ve learned with us into the next chapter.
In a world of contrast it is only natural to desire to make something of beauty from the rubble of what stood before. So we keep moving forward. Getting stuck in the past would be tantamount to staying broken. We do our best to stay positive, to see the silver lining of what we’ve learned in every less than perfect situation. We release the anger and the pain and the bitter chain we don’t want to be shackled with. We heal and we become strong.
Vines that make the finest wines are not pampered. They are forced to decide where to put their energy and the fruits of their labor produce something magnificent. It is our bold adventures, for better or for worse that shape and mold and bring out the strength, complexity and the layers that tell the story of who we are.
Let us strive to live our lives strong, like the fine wines, whose vine's age and experiences make them all the more rich and delicious, intoxicating, and mysterious.
There are certain instances in which we don’t move forward with something or bring it to fruition because we feel it’s not perfect. Whatever it might be, we keep refining and revising, changing it around and mulling it over; which then devolves into procrastination and postponement and we don’t finish it because it never seems ‘perfect’. We second guess ourselves. We give up. What’s the use? It’s not perfect.
News Flash: Perfection is Subjective. Things are rarely ever truly perfect.
Perfection is a wily and elusive beast. It’s a trap, a construct of the ego trying to gain control. Perfection is fleeting; it is shifting and can turn on a dime. It breeds unrealistic standards that are very difficult to live up to.
Tweaking and revising are part of the process of most any endeavor. It’s the way we improve upon it, refine it to be what we want it to be, but when falling short of perceived perfection stop us in our tracks and keeps us from moving forward, the pursuit of perfection becomes counterproductive.
Think about something as simple as keeping your home clean (relatively speaking depending on who you share your space with). You know it’s going to get messy again and yet you continue cleaning it because to not do so results in, well an even bigger mess. Trash piles up along with dirty dishes and laundry. Dust bunnies grow to biblical proportions under the couch if not regularly attended to. The state of cleanliness in your home is rarely perfect because you live there and life is messy. Keeping your home clean is a process. Chances are you are a relatively sane human being and you understand this. You don’t just give up and stop cleaning your house because it’s only going to get messy again. You stay on it, you keep at it and you keep moving. And while you may achieve a perfectly spotless kitchen at days end, you know that as soon as someone wakes up and makes coffee and breakfast the state of cleanliness in your kitchen will change. You accept this and you release control. And the whole process begins again.
So why does the pursuit of perfection trip up in other areas of our lives? Whether it’s a fitness regimen, a diet, a creative project, a career goal…pick your prospect…we can get derailed in the pursuit of perfection.
Chances are we’re doing the best we can at a given moment. Some days we have 120% to give and some days we have only 20%. Most days it’s somewhere in between but let’s be real; we’ve all had those days when ‘Good Enough’ has to be good enough. Most times we strive to do better because we feel that ‘good enough’ is just barely making the grade, is reserved for unmotivated slackers and we’re capable of so much more. We beat ourselves up at both ends of the spectrum because we’re either behaving like a slacker or we can’t seem to achieve perfection despite our best efforts.
There is a space in between these two pendulum swings.